Notes From Inside The Closet

This blog is for everyone who wants to come out, everyone who is coming out, everyone who is out and everyone who doesn't want to come out. Here, we can write letters to ourselves, to the people we want to come out to and anyone else about coming out.

April 4, 2013 11:47 am

You know, and then again…you don’t

You know how I feel about you. But you are with someone. You’re my best friend. We’ve all accepted things for the way they are, especially me. As long as I get to have you in my life, as long as that person makes you truly happy, I can be happy. But there’s just one thing I wish I could do.

I don’t feel like I’m allowed to say why I’m in love with you, just that I am. I can’t write a love letter to someone who already has a someone. So I can write it like this, put it out in the world, and hope you’ll one day read it and smile, wondering whether or not it’s about you. Like that one song. So this is my love letter to you.

I love your tenacity. I know what you’ve been through and I know who you are now. To come out the other side, being as loving and open minded as you are…that’s rare.

I love your mind. You’re not just intelligent, you’re insightful. You go places that most people don’t, and not because they can’t but because they don’t want to. You’re fascinated by the why, by the root causes, by the motivation.

I love your beauty. It’s not just that you are pretty. It’s that you own it. I look at you and for that little fleeting moment I forget that I could be attracted to anyone else on the face of the planet, man or woman. I wish you could see yourself through my eyes.

I love your talents. I love that you have this innate ability to teach because I admire it. I love that you can do almost anything. You’re athletic, you’re artistic, and you’re willing to try things that I’m not. That willingness in itself is a talent.

I love your ability to love. I love that you’ve done everything you possibly can to help ease the pain of the situation for me. You didn’t have to. But you understand what I need and what you can give, and you match those two things up beautifully. I love the lengths you go to for the person you love. You have a capacity for caring that some people don’t possess.

I love that you’ve let us stay so close. You’re willing to deal with the difficult, to make it work. I know you say you need me too, but you and I both know that really…you have someone else. And eventually, hopefully, I will too. But we’re still friends, so thank you.

I would be prouder than anyone possibly could to call you my girl, but since I can’t I’m happy to be prouder than anyone possibly could to call you my best friend. I’ll be proud to be your best friend, you best man, your anything you need. Just let me know.

I love you. I really do.

  1. hearttherapy reblogged this from notesfrominsidethecloset and added:
    I’m like, in tears
  2. kemet-x-riku reblogged this from notesfrominsidethecloset
  3. les-bi-awesome said: This is so beautiful <3
  4. notesfrominsidethecloset posted this